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Mar04

Time…Again

by admin on March 4, 2013 at 5:15 pm

Posted In: John - Personal Sharing, Self Improvemet

Time…Again

One of my favorite songs is Styx’ “Too Much Time on my Hands.” However, most of us don’t have that luxury. I assert people waste time. People waste their own time, or more importantly they waste other’s time. Time is a nonrenewable, there’s nothing to replace it. I hate people wasting my time due to their inability to manage their own time.

Example, have you ever waited in the doctor’s office? You have a scheduled appointment and find 45 minutes past the scheduled time the doctor finally makes it in to see you. How about the cable guy? A block of time is given for cable or internet installation, “he’ll be there between 10am and noon tomorrow,” the installation scheduler tells you. After taking off time from work you watch the clock hoping the installer will arrive anytime. As noon comes and goes our irritation builds. Finally, at 1:35pm the installer shows and we realize we are at his mercy.

On the other hand we expect a flight schedule or train schedule to run perfectly. Airlines are actually penalized for a failure to arrive on time or depart. School bells similarly ring at certain times – life as a teacher (I did this job once) is dictated by the bell.

I work with a variety of people and have noted almost all are incredibly conscientious of being on time. Appointments scheduled with sales leads execute on time. At the executive level there is significant respect for other people’s time I find myself guilty though, on days when over-booked with appointments and there is no slack in the schedule, of running late. I am generally late by no more than a few minutes, but running late nonetheless.

To me it appears economic status also impacts respect for time. Additionally, culture has a huge impact. Maybe time is not worth much to them. Culturally in America with certain groups it appears being late is fashionable, part of the norm. Our own President Obama has been criticized as the first president unable to punctually follow a schedule; bad time management, cultural habit, arrogance, or disrespect for others? I once had a dinner party and waited nearly 90 minutes for two guests, of a different culture, to arrive.

I’ve made a resolution to be overly conscious of how I manage time. More importantly I have made a resolution to hypersensitivity respect other’s time. This is especially important when someone has invited me to a meeting. In addition I want to ensure I am not only on time, but give quality time. I have also made a pact with myself to have no electronic devices in meetings to ensure I give them my undivided attention.

When I was an Air Force ROTC cadet I was taught a very important saying, “If you are on time you are late. If you are early you are on time.” A professor in MBA School similarly shared wisdom with our class and called it “flat tire time.” He said you should always leave for an appointment with enough time to change a flat tire and not be late. Most people could not imagine arriving early, so early, but the problem is easily solved by keeping a book handy.

My question for you is, “do you respect or waste other people’s time?”

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Dec30

2012 Nelson Recap

by admin on December 30, 2012 at 4:56 pm

Posted In: John - Personal Sharing

2012 Recap

LeeAnn and I started talking about 2012 this morning and discussed all of the things we have done this year. Our year has been full and I thought it would be fun to recap, share with my kids, family and friends.

New Year’s 2012 in New York

We started the new year in New York at LeeAnn’s Uncle Joe’s house after celebrating New Year’s Eve. Haley, Marcella, and Jack had never been to one of LeeAnn’s family events before and it was overwhelming with food, family, and celebration.

Our biggest impacts in 2012 were Ty as the newest addition to our family and me traveling to Dallas. Meanwhile, LeeAnn was going to school and taking care of Ty and James on her own. We made a trip to Daytona Beach the last weekend of the month to go to the Rolex 24-hour race, another chance to spend time with Haley, Marcella, and Jack.

Jack at the Rolex Race

February came fast and we went to Florida the first weekend for Marcella’s dance competition at Disney. LeeAnn and I also managed a business trip to Charleston, SC that gave us a short weekend away. We wrapped up February with another trip to Florida for Jack’s Cub Scout to Boy Scout Crossover.

March was a little easier, less traveled with LeeAnn and I making a 10 day trip to Dallas in anticipation of moving. We had the kids in Georgia the following week and shared with them we would be moving.

The second week of April we made another trip to Florida, this time for Haley’s Sweet 16 Birthday party. Our good friends Barbara and Neal were able to spend time with us, little did we know it would be the last time we would see Barbara (R.I.P..June 2012). The following weekend LeeAnn, the boys, and I made a trip to New York for Ty’s Christening.

May started with LeeAnn graduating with her accounting degree, two solid years of work behind her and adding to her marketing degree. For Mother’s Day I took her to the Biltmore House in Asheville, something we had talked about the entire time we lived in north Georgia and now time to go with urgency around moving in front of us. Memorial Day capped the month with Haley, Marcella, and Jack coming to the cabin. More importantly, our friends Greg and Chelley from Florida came up, and my sister and her family with my cousin Kevin and his family made it over. We have a Memorial Day celebration on the porch at the cabin.

June was the Genesis of a new part of our life – a move to Dallas from Georgia, The hardest part of the change was not Dallas, but the distance from Haley, Marcella, and Jack. However, I “sold it” to them based on the opportunity to see a new part of the country. We moved in to our apartment on June 8^th. I made a trip to Salem the week of June 24^th and then flew back to Atlanta to meet my kids in Tifton, Georgia (Starbucks) on June 29^th – we drove straight through to Dallas.

James and Ty in the pool at the apartment in Texas

July was about sharing Dallas with Haley, Marcella, and Jack. I worked my ass off at work and they went to the pool every day. However, we all took a trip to the Pacific Northwest (Portland, Salem, Seattle, and Vancouver) which we followed by a cruise on the Inside Passage to Alaska. A great time to leave Dallas when it is 105 degrees. LeeAnn’s nieces came when we returned and we shared DFW

Stockyards, Ft. Worth TX

experiences with the kids.

August 9^th found us in New Orleans taking my kids back to Florida to meet their mother in Tallahassee. In a rented minivan LeeAnn and

My daughters, Haley and Marcella, on Bourbon Street New Orleans

My Dad came to visit – four Nelson men: Bob, John, Ty, James

I made our way to the cabin. It gave us a chance to see my parents, check on the house, and more importantly drive the motorhome out to Texas (with big plans to vacation in it!). James started school upon our return – attending a Montessori school in Las Colinas. The highlight of the trip was my Dad coming home with us. We were able to take my Dad to see my Uncle Gary in LaGrange, Texas.

September could not have come sooner. We had no company, we were settled, and we seemed to have a routine finally. LeeAnn started studying for the CPA exam and James was loving school. The week of September 10^th we went to Costa Rica, a trip I had longed for a long time and a reward LeeAnn gave herself for finishing school. I also began taking steps to attend law school: registering for the LSAT, studying, accruing reference letters and filling out applications. Long a dream, but always impossible, living in Dallas with two schools offering part-time programs made it seem realistic. The last weekend of the month was concluded with a visit from my sister-in-law Margaret. The highlight, LeeAnn and I bought cowboy boots. James also started t-ball! This was a new experience for us having practice twice per week and games all day Saturdays.

Jack came to visit – flying by himself

October 6 was the LSAT exam for me, and then off to James’ t-ball games on a cold, dreary day. Jack came to see us by himself, his first time traveling alone and I made a trip to Florida for NBAA which allowed me to see Haley, Marcella, and Jack in New Smyrna for dinner one evening. We found out LeeAnn passed the Financial section of the CPA – another milestone!

November started with LeeAnn having foot surgery that put her on crutches for 6 weeks – a challenging time

My Mom, Karen, came to help LeeAnn with her crutches

for us. My Mom came out to help for 10 days so I could travel for week. The second weekend of the month Haley, Marcella, and Jack came to Dallas and we did an early birthday celebration for James. Sometime in

My daughter, Haley, loves my new Jeep

the month we found time to buy a new car, a 2013 Jeep Wrangler Unlimited, trading in our Volkswagen. When Thanksgiving came LeeAnn was still on crutches so I did all of the cooking for us and we had our neighbors/friends from downstairs over for the day. November 29^th was James’ real birthday so we took him to Medieval Times in Dallas (Lee on crutches..) and LeeAnn’s birthday was the following day. We managed dinner out the next day – all you can eat sushi.

LeeAnn with crutches

Ty’s 1st Birthday

James’ on his 5th birthday at Medieval Times in Dallas

It was hard to believe December finally made it. We were challenged with LeeAnn’s crutches, Christmas shopping, planning a trip to Georgia for the holidays, and Ty’s 1^st birthday. Somehow we managed to get it all done! More important, LeeAnn continued to study for the CPA, I found out I was accepted to one of the law schools of many to which I applied, I traveled, balanced work, and we made important decisions for our family.

Each year I try to challenge myself to do more, to stay ahead. I also want to share with my kids adventures in life. As I look to 2013 I know there will be many challenges and much excitement. Like last year, LeeAnn and the boys will start the year in New York, me – Dallas. Where we end the year I do not know. However, I know we will move to Florida by March, LeeAnn will wrap up all of the CPA exams and find a job, James and Ty will both start a new day school, James will play spring t-ball, living in Florida will facilitate closer relationships with Haley/Marcella/Jack and bring us even closer together. In the summer we are taking a family vacation our west to the Grand Canyon with my sister-in-law, and in the Fall James will start Kindergarten and I will start law school part time. Haley will take the SATs again in March and the two of us will work on picking a college as she starts her Senior year of high school. I don’t know what unexpected events will transpire but I am confident we can handle anything we face.

My daughters, Haley and Marcella, on their visit to Dallas and Bass Pro in November 2012

James celebration of life at Las Colinas Montessori

The great blizzard of 2012 in Las Colinas, TX

James’ on his 5th birthday at Medieval Times in Dallas

Arriving in Florida after a great summer – Haley, Marcella, Jack, James and Ty

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Oct30

I love cars

by admin on October 30, 2012 at 12:58 pm

Posted In: John - Personal Sharing

Recently I saw an early 1980’s Datsun 280ZX in perfect condition pass by and it reminded me of the one I owned from 1986-1988. I

AFROTC Cadet John Nelson and 1980 280ZX

loved that car. It was black with rust fenders when I bought it. I cut out the rust, put in new metal, added some Bondo, and had the car painted gun metal gray. With tan leather interior and 5-speed the little two-seater was a blast to drive with Frankie Goes to Hollywood singing “Relax” as a cruised the highway from Gainesville to Crescent Beach.

Remembering my Z-car created a flood of memories of different cars I have owned from a BMW to a Crown Victoria and I thought it would be interesting to list them.

1973 Volkswagen Super Beetle (1984-1986) – my first car. The little 4-speed manual was fun to drive. In red and rather plain I was glad to have a car. I started reading VW Magazine and found myself soon making modifications to the Beetle. I sanded out the rust and repainted it with a new shade of red. I replaced the front windows with tinted one piece windows and added Baby Turbo mirrors. Of course, I installed a new stereo and speakers. This is the car that got me from Minnesota to Florida to go to college. Ultimately, my sister got this car.

1980 Datsun 280ZX (1986-1988) – Loved this car…A 5-speed with power windows, mirrors, cruise control and just shit hot fun to drive.

Just washed, 1988 Honda CRX

1988 Honda CRX (1988-1990) – My first brand new car. Tinted the windows nearly black, installed a new stereo, and got nearly 40 mpg. The car was white with a dark blue interior. The 5-speed had great mileage but lacked power and pizazz I wanted, especially after the Z-car.

1990 Honda Prelude Si (1990-1992) – My second brand new car and first out of college. I put 60k miles on this car in two years commuting to work. It was also the last time I every leased a car. White with a dark interior and 5-speed it was fun to drive home with the sunroof open.

1990 Honda Prelude – note the owner’s bleach blonde hair

1988 Honda Civic DX (1990-1995) – By marriage I inherited this car. We put 120k mile on the 5-speed, red, plain jane Honda. It was cheap to drive and did its job.

1992 Jeep Cherokee Laredo (1992-2012) – This car replaced the Honda and it is still in the family with 230,000 miles. I drove it off the lot in Spartanburg, South Carolina with 78 miles on the odometer. The Jeep was rugged and a great family hauler.

1990 Buick LeSabre (1995) – a company car. Silver, big boat.

1973 MGB Convertible (1994-1996) – My first fun car. Green with a black top. Not quite as much fun as I expected because of its lack of power. But, I could put the top down and drive around in a classic convertible.

1994 Ford Crown Victoria (1995-1996) – I was working as the branch manager of an engineering company driving all over the southeast. This car made sense, plus I looked like a cop driving it. It was dark green with a gray leather interior. The big V-8 went like hell and it road like my living room couch going down the road.

1967 Mustang Convertible (1996-Present) – I finally got the car I always wanted, and still have it until this day. It took 8 years to restore and has been on the road for 8 years. Green with a tan interior and top this car turns heads.

1967 Mustang Hardtop (1996) – I bought this car to cut up and build my convertible, but I couldn’t do it. Some work on it and a new paint job I sold the six-cylinder automatic within 6-weeks for twice what I paid.

1988 BMW 325i (1996-1998) – I sold the Crown Vic when I quit my job and went on my own. This 5-speed BMW was a little worn when I got it but I learned what “the Ultimate Driving Machine” meant. I remember my ex-wife calling “Big Money Waste”. The gray on gray 4-door ran well unless it was in the shop.

1969 Cessna 150K (1997-2001) – I felt it would make sense to mention my first airplane about this time…

1996 Chevrolet Monte Carlo (1998-1999) – OK the BMW bit the dust and need about $1500 in repairs. Emergency trade for the most boring car I ever owned. More or less a Lumina with two doors and the crappiest seat and interior known. Chevy used to suck super badly.

1998 Ford Expedition (1999-2002) – So I was out of town and the Monte Carlo broke down. That led to a decision to get the Expedition. This SUV was good looking, deep burgundy with a tan leather interior, but the highway ride always sucked. I think the right rear tire was out of round but replacing it did no good and there was always noise from the rear-end.

2000 Volkswagen Passat (2000-2001) – The economic downturn in 2001 post 9/11 drove selling this car. This German car performed great and was incredible on the road.

2002 Dodge Caravan (2002-…) – my ex-wife still has this car. Dark blue on a gray interior. Quite honestly, a great investment (like the Jeep). A car that delivered what it was meant to do: haul our family well.

The driveway at this point had the Mustang under restoration, the Jeep showing about 75k miles and the minivan. Divorce led me in a new car direction. I got the Jeep and kept my Mustang.

For a while I enjoyed driving, on occasion a 2003 Nissan Murano.

1996 Chevrolet Suburban (2005-2007) – I had to get a bigger car to get around. The Suburban was the answer with kids to haul. I was able to park the Jeep in my warehouse and hang onto it.

1994 Honda Shadow – (2006-2008) – My first motorcycle. Black and white, I added saddle bags and took the windscreen off.

1995 Piper Saratoga N325CA (2006-2009) – I think I am shedding tears on this one. An incredibly beautiful aircraft worthy of note. I traveled to New York, the Bahamas, back and forth to Texas, all over the southeast, and to Oshkosh. I loved this 6-seater aircraft. I miss N325CA.

2006 Honda Civic EX (2006-2011) – LeeAnn had this car when we got married. It was a decked out Honda that we put 100k miles on. I only wish it had been a 5-speed instead of an automatic, but otherwise I have great family memories and we went many places in this Honda.

1974 Corvette Convertible (2007-2008) – This car had more speed than anything I have owned. The silver on silver sports car was an automatic with the 350 cu in standard engine. There were rattles from the top and door windows but this car turned heads and was truly a lot of fun.

2007 Ford Freestyle (2007-2010) – Leeann and I bought this car together, our first new car. Main reason was three rows of seats so we could move four kids around in reasonable comfort without breaking down. The Suburban was showing too much wear.

1996 Gulfstream Conquest E350 (2009-Present) – our motorhome. The Beast…

2007 Chevrolet Suburban LT – just after purchase parked at the cabin

2007 Chevrolet Suburban (2010-present) – We outgrew the Freestyle. The kids got bigger and we were going further. With five kids there could not be a better car for us as we can pack all of our gear in back, and use the roof. We have driven the Suburban to NYC twice, Florida a dozen times, and of course out to Texas. The Suburban will be with us for many years as she is reliable, solid, and gets the mission done.

2012 Volkswagen CC Lux (2011-Present) – a blast to drive the turbo-four 2.0 liter in black on black gets me around town and still gets 30 mpg. The Germans build great cars.

1980 Honda CB650 (2011-Present) – my second motorcycle. This bike is a lot of fun and the classic look of bikes I saw growing up.

I count 22 different cars I have had over 28 years of driving. I estimate I have driven approximately 500,000 miles. My favorite cars by far are the 280ZX and the Corvette. The car I love the most though is my 67 Mustang, probably because I built.

Where I could, I tried to find an image that matched my car as close as possible.

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Oct07

October and Looking Forward (10/7/2012)

by admin on October 7, 2012 at 12:35 pm

Posted In: General Rant, John - Personal Sharing, Self Improvemet

October and Looking Forward
(10/7/2012)

My last column was on my birthday, August 12^th. Since then I have worked to plan and accomplish several goals for the upcoming year. Most important among them was taking the LSAT. I feel too many people waste away time with meaningless “filler”, like watching the Sunday afternoon football games or episodes of Honey Boo Boo at night. Whereas, capturing and controlling time allows accomplishments.

As much as I think I manage to do a lot, continually working on professional development and spending time with my family I am often blown away by others. For instance, James Altucher continues to write and create new ideas. This column from last week shows a lot of insight into how he does so much. More important, he starts his day early – 4:30a and begins doing more before most people wake up.

Studying for the LSAT I did the same. Over the last seven weeks I ran my life like a training exercise. I awoke early most days, between 4:30a and 6:00a. I blocked 2-3 hours each day to study. Thus, I was able to find 40-60 hours to spend studying. In the evenings I studied, on weekends I studied. This is why I do not know who Romo is or can’t tell you scores of NFL games on Monday mornings. Five years from now what will matter more, today’s meaningless contest between multi-millionaires or working hard to advance my career?

I have made a decision to continue the challenge and find a true way to accomplish more. So many books exist, many people try hard but most methods fail. I think I am onto something. First, I am a believer in Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich. If you never read it, order it now. Second, passion is the driver for everything. Finally, I have discovered pre-planning and accountability drive an emotion that forces me to accomplish goals. Failure to meet my plans drives guilt and that keeps me on task. Others may describe it as character. My son learned at Cub Scouts that character is what you do when no one is looking. Maybe goals and desires are the same.

My action plan is setup like this:

- I took my August 12 list and planned out the entire year. Making reasonable plans to accomplish different goals.

- Every 6-7 weeks I will revisit the list and “blitz” the next major desires.

- Some goals will take the entire year, so they require ongoing attention.

- A year from now I can look back and evaluate.

With that in mind, here are my goals from the original column, “A birthday reflection.”

- Work on being a good dad and husband

I am managing this throughout the year by special messages to my kids (setup on my Outlook calendar) and scheduled date nights with my wife (on my calendar). Most important, I am trying to make sure I am not an asshole.

- Supporting LeeAnn with the CPA exam.

This one is easy. I continue to clear time on my calendar to put her first. Today, for instance, she is off studying for her first exam on October 12 and then will start another class for an exam on November 3^rd.

- “Born in ‘67’” – this is an ongoing item and my first task is to start writing weekly. Thus, I have setup my calendar for Saturday’s and Wednesday’s to start writing a page between now and December 1. Thereafter I will write everyday 500 words by getting up each morning. Over 100 days, I will essentially have completed 100 pages.

- “If I can remain fit and healthy” – yeah, just need to get back to the gym on this one. Starting tomorrow…

- “Learn a few Spanish phrases” – moving this one to the next phase, starting in December. We went to Costa Rica and the desire is there.

- “Happy Birthday” on my guitar – Ty and James’ birthdays are just around the corner. November 30^th so this is the new blitz

So, the short version for the next 7 weeks is:

- Learn to play “Happy Birthday” on my guitar

- Start working out on a regular schedule again

- I have four books to read: The 3^rd Hunger Games, Good to Great, a marketing book, and something personal

- My RV needs repair – the roof and suspension

- I have a longer term project that has some milestones to accomplish in the next 3-4 weeks and know with 100% I will complete those. However, important to list because of the time commitments.

- If I can write 15 pages for my book between now and December I will be satisfied too.

- And finally I have something I promised to take care of for LeeAnn

Sound like a lot? I don’t think so. Add work, travel, seeing kids twice, a lot of t-ball games and practices and it becomes more challenging. But, one thing is certain; I won’t waste my time with football…

In other words, don’t succumb to Bread and Circuses.

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Jun02

Gay Marriage will help Father’s Rights

by admin on June 2, 2012 at 4:48 pm

Posted In: Big Government, General Rant, John - Personal Sharing

Gay Marriage will help Father’s Rights

I’m divorced and have kids; I am not gay. In the near future these two worlds will collide as same-sex civil unions continue to increase and family court judges will face challenges previously unconsidered. Historically family court judges have awarded custody with a prejudice toward the mother over the father, but when a judge must consider custody between two fathers I assert there will be a move toward equal parenting.

My own journey into the family court system started in 2003 when I filed for divorce. Personally miserable, in a loveless marriage, I feared the impact of divorce upon my children. At the time my wife and I had relatively equal parental roles, but a traditional marriage affording her the opportunity to work part-time as a family court attorney while I was the primary income earner. Finally I made a choice to divorce and naively expected an agreement supportive of my role as a father.

It was then I learned there is a strong precedent to relegate divorced fathers to the sidelines in a child’s life. Out of fairness, we must recognize the historic precedent of the Mad Men style of philandering, leaving behind family for a younger woman. In the post-war era fathers were bread-winners and mothers were left to raise the kids. Divorce therefore required strong remedy to protect mom and children. Televisions shows like One Day at a Time of the 1970’s drove the need for child support and alimony to the public’s attention.

The father of the millennium is far different. We are hands-on, equally sharing in parental responsibility whether it is bathing, feeding, reading, or interests at school. We can change diapers, get up at night, and care for our ill sons and daughters. Our current two-income society has forced involvement, but more importantly we have rejected the parenting style of our fathers.

Unfortunately, the family court system has lagged behind and child support collection in many states has become a corrupt enterprise putting money ahead of family. If a father loses his job the state views it more important to incarcerate him than his role in his child’s life. Divorced dads have become checkbooks supporting wealth transfer to millions of women when most want to share equally in the responsibility of raising their children.

In May 2012 two states passed legislative changes supporting equal parenting. Minnesota’s Senate recently passed a law requiring a minimum 35% overnight time for either parent, focused on stability and importance of both parent’s role in their child’s life. More aggressively, Arizona passed SB1127 requiring equality for both parents.

I argue civil unions in the coming years will be the catalyst for divorced parental equality; gays seek marital equality and desire traditional family units, typically via adoption. For women, the task is easier, possibly avoiding adoption, but creates debate as arguments will focus on birth-mother versus mother-partner rights. Today’s court bias, children inherently belong with their mother, where father is stripped of parental influence and relegated to financial provider, will not work.

The “standard visitation” of dad seeing his children every other weekend and one night a week will fail when there are “two Moms” or “two Dads.” Gay marriage will instantly invalidate the bias toward Mom and force the courts to a presumption of parental equality. Politicians and courts will insert themselves in arguments and face challenges to sort out what they believe is “best” for children. As they do, the news will cover new versions of Kramer v. Kramer, but expect two men to be the center of the controversy.
.

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Jan30

A Recipe for Success

by admin on January 30, 2012 at 10:32 am

Posted In: Capitalism, Economic Development, John - Personal Sharing

A Recipe for Success (2/1/2012)

At dinner last week my friend Scott shared comments from a seminar he delivered to MBA students about entrepreneurship. His observation from spending time with these millennials was their questions focused on how to be successful; not in generalities but seeking a specific checklist void of risk. Mutually we agreed there is no checklist to succeed, but commonalities exist which create a method to achieve success. Personally I have formulated a recipe, based on experience and believe three essential elements are required: S-E-P, Evolution, and no Plan B.

S-E-P

is Skills, Education, and Passion. First,Skills are the know-how we develop over time that contribute to our expertise. For example, we all can pound a nail, but a carpenter knows how to build a house. In his book, Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell describes a 10,000 hour requirement for our skills to develop to an expert level. Second, Education is required to differentiate ourselves, but may come from military, college, or teachings of others. Most important, communication, whether written or verbal, is the critical learning requirement. Third, Passion is the ultimate differentiator between success and failure, but is the hardest to explain. Passion will drive one to succeed no matter what obstacles are confronted and passion is what engages us to continue when our energies are exhausted.

The second essential element is Evolution. Our lives are about learning from mistakes and this is the evolution I refer to, understanding how to move forward after a perceived failure and use failure as way to unlock opportunities. I argue each failure makes us stronger because they are events, not who we are. For example, when I owned my company many people assumed my most successful software program was the first I developed. To the contrary, I counted there were nearly 14 different programs I had tried to develop and sell. Most business owners evolve to create opportunities and rarely is success found the first time.

Lastly, to succeed there must be no “Plan B” because failure cannot be an option. I assert if an easier option exists affording failure then our effort will stop when the most difficult challenges loom. When failure is not an option, our creativity is ignited to try new methods and search for alternatives supporting our passion, in other words evolution occurs. For example, today’s college graduates can choose to move home because finding a job or supporting themselves is deemed impossible. If moving home was not an option these struggling graduates would share cheaper homes, work three jobs, and live on their own. Success cannot be had when one can turn his back on hard work and fear of bankruptcy.

There is no checklist for success, but I can assure you without elements of the above achieving success is impossible. Our current economy is tough and it saddens me when I hear about friends and neighbors losing jobs and homes, but at the same time I can identify friends finding success because they will not be victimized by systemic factors and have demonstrated the above elements. No guarantee for success exists, but I assure you practicing and understanding the above will bring reward.

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Dec23

Christmas Anticipation

by admin on December 23, 2011 at 6:21 am

Posted In: John - Personal Sharing

Anticipation

When I reflect on Christmas a montage of memories fill my head. Growing up in Minnesota I enjoyed a traditional white Christmas sitting by the Christmas tree looking at the wintry wonderland.

My most cherished Christmas though was our family trip to my grandparents in St. Petersburg, Flo

John looking on, Uncle Jim with his new remote control car, and John's Dad Bob

rida when I was seven. A warm, balmy Christmas included a trip to the beach and enviously watching my Uncle Jim play with a new remote control car outside; an outdoor treat for a Minnesotan. That same Christmas I remember driving everyone crazy because I “knew” what was in every box under the tree from shaking,

feeling and measuring every package. One gift for me caught my seven-year-old “know it all” attention because I was convinced it contained Legos. My Uncle Jim repeatedly encouraged me to tone down my attitude and cautioned me I might be wrong and a box of rocks.

On Christmas morning our family opened our gifts in the usual tradition, passing one to each member, taking a moment to open and comment while I impatiently anticipated my turn. Surrounded by my parents, sister, grandparents, and multiple aunts and uncles I greedily opened my presents and finally came to my anticipated present of Legos. I opened the package and was excited to see a Lego logo and a picture of a Lego police station; my Uncle Jim encouraged me to go ahead and open the box and look at the pieces. I was greeted by a bag of white gravel! My tears flowed and my Uncle laughingly and lovingly handed me the real Lego pieces.

I learned a lot that Christmas: to enjoy the anticipation of the holiday, the anticipation of opening a gift without knowing its contents, and not to take away from other’s enjoyment of the day.

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Nov06

Live Life Like You’re Dying

by admin on November 6, 2011 at 4:19 pm

Posted In: General Rant, John - Personal Sharing

Live Life Like You’re Dying (11/9/2011)

Too many people put off until tomorrow the things they want to do today. Personally, I am a goal oriented person and manage my life with short-term and long-term objectives. For example, with the change of seasons in north Georgia I am very conscious regarding preparations for winter: cutting and splitting wood, testing space heaters, and making sure outdoor water pipes are winterized. Easy examples, but yet also easy to put off until a storm like the one that hit the northeast is upon you.

Recently my wife and I have been watching the television show “24” from its beginning. In the second season the character George Mason is poisoned by radioactive material and knows he will die within the next seven days. Although he does not know specifically whether he will live days or a week, he begins making amends with his estranged son. Of course, this is fiction, but somberly reminds me life can change instantly. This past weekend two men were killed in a plane crash outside Williston, Florida. I knew one of the men, Mike Fuller, and planned to meet with him next week. In an instant, his life ended tragically.

Movies like, The Bucket List, Eat Love Pray, or Soul Surfer win our hearts in the theater due the common theme of perseverance against formidable odds. In each case a goal is set, and a plan executed to ultimately triumph over personal tragedy or dreams. I am follower of James Altucher’s blog, “JamesAltucher.com” and last week he wrote a column titled, “The #1 Most Effective Habit” that articulated the same points I want to make. First among them is being proactive. Too often I meet people who tell me they want to travel, write a book, or even learn to fly, but all succumb to excuses and the “naysayers.” Altucher challenges his readers to start by making a list, eliminate the “bad people” and most importantly just get started.

Over the last three weeks I have published a book, Clearly Ambiguous, hiked Yonah Mountain, and had a weekend away with my wife. None of the above is significant, but like the life goals in The Bucket List they incrementally take me to a better place in my life. Over the same three weeks I met a young man who hiked the Appalachian Trail last year and I read an article about 17 year-old Taylor De Lay who circumnavigated a homebuilt aircraft around the United States. I am guessing during the same three weeks many people did nothing, going to work, watching television, and griping about their misery. However, anyone can make a change in their own life.

So my question is, “what would you do differently today if you knew you were going to die in the next week or month?” My follow up question is obvious, “since you know you will die (someday – we all will die), why aren’t you living your life like your dying?”

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Aug03

Vacation Day 5 – Wednesday down to Gulf Shores

by admin on August 3, 2011 at 9:46 pm

Posted In: John - Personal Sharing, Vacations

It is hot and humid in Mobile, Alabama. I remember coming to the south when I was a kid and visiting my Aunt Carol and Uncle Gary in Beaumont, Texas. Living in Minnesota at the time I had no idea what humidity was like, it engulfs you and suffocates the breath out of you. This morning was the same. The RV is cold enough to hang meat and I stepped outdoors into the equivalent of a Swedish Sauna. With that said, it is still pretty here. Last night the kids and I found a pier in the campground and we were able to see alligators lingering in the water, waiting for one of us to fall in. Of course, we are the strangers in their habitat, not the other way around. More entertaining were jack rabbits on the trail to the pier, the size of small dogs these rabbits were not shy and remained close to us – within 10 feet. There are also giant grasshoppers here, about 3 inches long and black.

James awoke at 6:05 today so we got an early start. I washed dishes and cleaned up. I have had a chance to write some code, write some book chapters, and reboot my POS (piece of sh*t) computer about four times as it does a blue screen of death every time I insert the wireless card. Jack is eating cheerios and James has inhaled a cup of Ovaltine and a granola bar. Marcella is in her usual sleeping state.

We headed out of Meaher State Park after breakfast and went to the USS Alabama Memorial Park. I have been to many museums, but honestly nothing nearly as impressive as this. We toured the battleship, seeing things just as they looked in 1942. Truly this is one of the best “frozen in time” museum displays I have seen in my life. The ship was put in condition just like it was in WWII. After the tour of the Alabama we saw aircraft preserved, my favorite an SR-71 Blackbird (always wanted to fly one) and then headed to see the USS Drum Submarine. I have never been aboard a submarine and this was impressive. There is something seemingly odd about these WWII vessels – it seems like we took a sudden leap in technology, almost alien in some aspects. Aboard the Alabama there was a “Degaussing” room – a generator feeding copper coils strung about the ship to prevent a magnetic field from forming. I have a degree in Chemical Engineering and understand physics concepts, but who would think of that?

After the USS Alabama we headed across the bay on I-10 and down to Gulf Shores. We are staying at Gulf States Park. Again, another amazing Alabama State Park. I just wish there were more trees here. We went to the beach and then came back for dinner: Steak (soaked in Whiskey), green beans, and macaroni and cheese. After dinner we went to check out the pool; Alabama spared no money on their investment here (other than trees) and the pool is amazing. We are now back at the RV and the kids are watching a movie. I have an early morning phone call and need to call it a night.

Two last things: My kids asked me why I blog our vacation details. I explained to them what seems obvious now is erased by the sands of time. I have blogged my trips to Israel and Oshkosh thinking I would never forget. I blogged the death of my dog Shadow and see the hurt I felt. Blogging creates a diary and Marcella and Jack both decided to start their own. Second, RVing. It is easy to mock people in the South, combine that with RVing and we are easy targets. There is probably nothing more family oriented than hitting the road and traveling in an RV. I cannot imagine people I would rather spend time with than my kids. Today they proved themselves once again my helping me this morning; while I went to shower they dried and put away the breakfast dishes, disconnected the water and power, and brought in the slide. They understand responsibility and I put it out there for them to take. Too many parents my age (43) expect far less of their kids and baby them. I live life like a 1950’s Dad and expect them to step up and help. My kids have life skills and always amaze me.

PS – I guess we are hungry. James and Marcella got cookies and Jack is making popcorn. I just made taco dip:

1/2 brick cream cheese softened and spread on the bottom of a 5×5 dish

Add about 1/2 jar salsa over the top

shred 1/2 brick Monterey Jack cheese over the top

Nuke for 1-1 1/2 minutes.

└ Tags: Travel

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